Experiences of Loneliness Among Adults Who Attended Boarding School

Background: Loneliness is linked to multiple mental and physical health conditions. It can be chronic and recurrent; those who experience loneliness in childhood may be more prone to experiencing it in adulthood. The school environment could be a setting where loneliness is first experienced. Boarding school students may be particularly vulnerable due to separation from parents and increased exposure to bullying. Currently, few studies explore boarding school and loneliness. Aims: To explore experiences of loneliness for adult ex-boarders. Method: A qualitative technique was used. In total, 18 adult ex-boarders were recruited using purposive and snowball sampling. Individual semi-structured interviews were held via video-call. Data were transcribed and analysed in line with thematic analysis, using NVivo 12 software. Findings: Five main themes were found including, Perspectives on Loneliness, How We Learned to Hide Our Vulnerability, Navigating Loneliness as Ex-Boarders, Avoidance and Resilience; Two Sides of the Same Coin and Bonds Both Protect and Predispose Loneliness. In addition, 13 subthemes were discussed. Adult ex-boarders gave varied definitions and descriptions of loneliness. Barriers to addressing loneliness at boarding school and in adulthood were discussed, including a sense of stigma and shame to admitting loneliness. Coping mechanisms used to combat loneliness were both avoidant and adaptive; for some, strategies to cope with loneliness at boarding school are still used today. Conclusions: Boarding schools should be encouraged to normalise loneliness for students. Findings suggest a need for increased support to address loneliness at boarding school. This may alleviate experiences of loneliness that persist into adulthood. Ex-boarders may be poorly equipped to recognise when they are experiencing loneliness, or cope when it occurs. There is a still a strong stigma surrounding admitting loneliness that needs to be addressed within the boarding school system and more widely.